For those of you who are sensible and intelligent, and only came here to make enquiries about the computer and web design services provided to the Central Coast area of New South Wales, Australia, by Brian Brett, please read no further, you can find out all you need to know by going here
The rest of this site is far too silly for a decent person such as your good self.
Welcome to the home of The Lime Beer Corporation, the company that invented, and now brews, the most fabulous ale on this or any other planet: the legendary Lime Beer. Headquartered in a building straddling the border between the Chilean and Argentinean portions of Tierra Del Fuego, the Board continues to avoid international intervention by crossing the border to go to the toilet, and by telling lies that are only audible to persons sitting on the Argentinean side, whilst themselves sitting on the Chilean side. Even George Dubberyar Bush has trouble working out which regime to change.
We tried unsuccessfully for many years to develop Lime Beer, but it was not until the beginning of 1939 that we made a major breakthrough by adding limes to our concoction. For us, this was a major turning point. We released our ale on an unsuspecting world in the early hours of 1 September, 1939. Fifteen seconds later, Hitler invaded Poland and the world was once again at war. Since then, many, many politicians have spent billions of dollars trying to make the connection between the two events. It was a complete waste of time and money, as we had to replace the original Board in it's entirety in 1946 following the first Nuremburg trial and they were unavailable for press conferences or talk shows (except maybe for Jerry Springer).
The current international sales chief, Mr. O. B. McLaden, said recently, "In a world scared shitless by the antics of the likes of George Dubberyar Bush, Tony 'who's a pretty boy then' Blair, and Little Johnny 'the lackey's lackey' Howard, more and more people will seek the green oblivion of our lime ridden ale."
These pages chronicle the rise of this magnificent product, brought to you by the same sociopaths that thrust unsolicited email, pop-up and pop-under windows, and GUIs bolted on top of command line driven operating systems, upon the modern world. As a result, at the latest count, 27% of humanity have gone back up into the trees. Lime trees, mainly.
"When only the greenest will do".
Lime Beer is currently only available home delivered, but may be ordered by forwarding cash to any Kenyan or Nigerian internet café, or by letting one of our patrolling pink Cadillac pimpmobiles know of your addiction by hanging bunches of limes from your mailbox or front gate.
Miss the unmitigated crap that 'adorned' the original sites run by The Holy Dickhead, such as the Lime Beer pages? Really? How quaint. Well, if you are fair dinkum, you can make contact with The Misbegotten One , who will, on a dark and moonless night, enter upon un-hallowed ground and disinter the data from it's unquiet grave. There really was an awful amount of crap, so when you contact The World's Wondrous Wanker , be sure to specify exactly what idiocy you wish to have extracted from the mire. Of course, being quite a lazy bastard, He has probably plagiarised most of his own stuff onto this site anyway!
All the above waffle is now moot, as the lazy oaf has plagiarised his entire sites to new locations, which may be got at through this page.
Copyright © Brian Brett 2003 - 10191
The Lime Beer Corporation was paid to create this Site by all the other
Webmasters on
the planet, with a view to making all other websites appear excellent by
comparison.
This website will shortly be the only path from your computer to the Internet.
Applications by web surfers to commit suicide will receive favourable
consideration.
